A few technical terms!
Kaikotti Kali
Kaikottikali is a popular folk dance form of Kerala, a state in southern India. It is also known as Thiruvathirakali. The dance is usually performed in a circle, with women joining hands and moving around a traditional lamp called the “Thiruvathira Kali Vilakku”. Kaikottikali is often accompanied by traditional music, including the chenda, maddalam, and ilathalam. Song is about the wedding ceremony of Lord Shiva and his consort Parvati. If you are interested to know the meaning of the song please check this link.
Thalappoli
Thalappoli is a ritual ceremony performed to invite the bride to her new family. Bathed and dressed in Kerala traditional dress, the women line up with holding a thalam (a plate) in their hands filled with fresh paddy, flowers & lighted lamp to ceremoniously welcome her to her new family.
Arpuvili & Kurava
These are forms of ululation (Ulok Dhwani), as an expression of joy, celebration, or reverence.
Kolam
Kolam is a form of traditional decorative art that is drawn by using rice flour as per age-old conventions. It conveys the idea of homage to the goddesses Lakshmi and Bhudevi (Earth).
Typical Wedding Ceremony Script
Vivaha Thalennu (Day Before The Wedding)
Western tradition has rehearsal dinner, our tradition has a whole bunch of programs. We had a variation of Ayanioonu & Kudiveppu in Portland, as Gautam & Tara’s marriage was during Labor Day weekend and the Portland reception happened 2 weeks after the wedding.
Mehndi and Haldi
Mehendi (Henna) is very popular with both men and women also as a conditioner and dye for hair. However, its most important use comes in a Hindu Wedding as Mehendi is considered among the most auspicious ‘ornaments’ of a married woman. It is temporary, and will fade in a few weeks, so go ahead, and have fun with the intricate temporary tattoos! The Haldi (turmeric) ceremony is celebrated with joy, hilarity, grandeur, and color, much like any Indian rite! On the Mehndi/Haldi ceremony day, there is singing, dancing, and eating excellent cuisine.
Ayanioonu
“Ayanioonu” marks the beginning of the festivities. It is generally held on the day before marriage. This ritual involves the bride and groom having a traditional meal in their respective houses at the same auspicious time (muhurat). The main event on this day is not just having a meal (Oonu) and the most important event on this day is when the elders of the family bless them for their onward journey as a husband and wife. After this function, traditionally, the groom along with the groom’s entourage would formally set out to the bride’s home for the marriage. In earlier days, the marriage ceremony was conducted at the bride’s house.
Vivaha Divasam (Day Of The Wedding)
Varavelpu
It is customary for the groom to arrive at the wedding venue with a grand procession, accompanied by his family and friends. The arrival of the groom is a significant event in the wedding ceremony, and it is accompanied by music, dance, and fireworks. The bride’s family welcomes the groom and his entourage with great excitement and hospitality, offering them refreshments and garlands.
Thalikettu
The Thalikettu ceremony is usually performed after the groom’s arrival at the wedding venue, and the bride is brought to the stage where the ceremony takes place. The groom ties the mangal sutra around the bride’s neck while a priest recites mantras and blessings. Following this, the groom gives the traditional two-piece Kerala saree (Pudava) to the bride.
Paani Grahanam
The Panigrahanam ceremony is a significant ritual of the Hindu wedding ceremony that takes place after the Kanyadaan ceremony, where the father of the bride gives his daughter to the groom. It signifies the groom’s acceptance of the bride as his wife and his commitment to fulfilling his duties towards her.
Saptapadi
A Hindu wedding is a joyous and elaborate celebration that involves various customs and rituals and is steeped in tradition and symbolism. The main part of the wedding is “Saptapadi” or “Saat Phere”. This refers to the seven rounds taken by the bride and groom around the sacred fire during their wedding ceremony. “Saptapadi” is a Sanskrit word that means “seven steps” or “seven strides”.
During the Saptapadi ritual, the bride and groom take seven vows or promises, one for each round. These vows are considered sacred and binding, and they symbolize the couple’s commitment to each other.
| 1 | Respect and honor each other GROOM: इष एकपदी भव सा मामनुव्रता भव।पुत्रान्विदावहै बहूंस्ते सन्तु जरदष्टयः॥ BRIDE: त्वत्तो मेऽखिलसौभाग्यं पुण्यैस्त्वं विविधै: कृतै: । देव ! संपादितो मह्यं वधूराद्ये पदेऽब्रवीत् ।। |
| 2 | Share and care for each other G: ऊर्जे द्विपदी भव सा मामनुव्रता भव। पुत्रान्विदावहै बहूंस्ते सन्तु जरदष्टयः॥ B: कुटुंबं पालयिष्यामि ह्यावृद्धबालकादिकम् । यथालब्धेन संतुष्ठा व्रते कन्या व्दितीयके ।। |
| 3 | Grow and develop together G: रायस्योषाय त्रिपदी भव सा मामनुव्रता भव। पुत्रान्विदावहै बहूंस्ते सन्तु जरदष्टयः॥ B: मिष्ठान्नव्यंजनादिनी काले संपादये तव । आज्ञासंपादिनी नित्यं तृतीये साऽब्रवीव्दरम् ।। |
| 4 | Be loyal and faithful to each other G: मा यो भव्याय चतुष्पदी भव सा मामनुव्रता भव। पुत्रान्विदावहै बहूंस्ते सन्तु जरदष्टयः॥ B: शुचि: शृंगारभूषाऽहं वाङ्मन: कायकर्मभि: । क्रीडि ष्यामि त्वया सार्धं तुरीये सा वदेव्दरम् ।। |
| 5 | Be blessed with healthy and noble children G: प्रजाभ्यः पंचपदी भव सा मामनुव्रता भव। पुत्रान्विदावहै बहूंस्ते सन्तु जरदष्टयः॥ B: दु:खे धीरा सुखे हृष्टा सुखदु:खविभागिनी । नाहं परतरं यामि पंचमे साऽब्रवीव्दरम् ।। |
| 6 | Live a peaceful and harmonious life together G: ऋतुभ्यः षट्पदी भव सा मामनुव्रता भव। पुत्रान्विदावहै बहूंस्ते सन्तु जरदष्टयः॥ B: सुखेन सर्वकर्माणि करिष्यामि गृहे तव । सेवा श्वसुरयोश्चामि बन्धूनां सत्कृतिं तथा ।। यत्र त्वं वा अहं तत्र नाहं वञ्चे प्रियं क्वचित् । नाहं प्रियेण वञ्चा हि कन्या षष्ठे पदेऽब्रवीत् ।। |
| 7 | Remain friends and companions throughout their lives. G: सखा सप्तपदी भव सा मामनुव्रता भव। पुत्रान्विदावहै बहूंस्ते सन्तु जरदष्टयः॥ B: होमयज्ञादिकार्येषु भवामि च सहाय्यकृत् । धर्मार्थकामकार्येषु मनोवृत्तानुसारिणी ।। सर्वेऽत्र साक्षिणस्त्वं मे पतिर्भूतोऽसि सांप्रतम् । देहो मयार्पितस्तुभ्यं सप्तमे साऽब्रवीव्दरम् ।। |
Sindoor
For women growing up in a South Asian society, red has always been a signifier of adulthood and of female power, and the sindoor ceremony is no exception. When the groom places red vermillion powder onto the bride’s head where her hair is parted, she transitions into a married woman.
Arundhati Nakshatram
In Hindu weddings, it is customary for the newlywed couple to look for Arundhati in the night sky as a symbol of their marital bond and commitment to each other. The groom shows the star to the bride, and they both offer prayers to Arundhati for a long and happy married life.
The astronomical names of Vasistha and Arundhati were Mizar and Alcor, respectively. They take orbit through the cosmos. So, this twin star symbolizes the bond of a husband and wife.
Vivaha Pittennu (Day After The Wedding)
Kudiveppu
“Kudiveppu” (Griha Pravesh), is the formal entry of the newlyweds into the groom’s residence welcomed with Thalappoli, Ashtamangalyam & a lot of fanfare.
There is a ceremonial welcome for the bride as part of the groom’s family where the rituals are performed with the couple seated in “Nadumitttam”, the central courtyard. It is customary for the bride to wear the “Pudava” given by the groom during the wedding.
The younger sibling of the groom washes the feet of the bride and the groom and welcomes them in. The bride comes through the front porch decorated with kolams and places her right foot on the paddy (rice covered with husk), and left foot on rice. This custom is done to signify that the bride has come to your home in the form of Goddess Laxmi and she will bring wealth, fortune, and prosperity in the house.
The bride’s mangal sutra is moved into a gold chain on this day. The lady of the house performs Pujas after which all present feed them milk and banana. Milk represents purity and nourishment, while bananas are seen as a symbol of abundance and fertility. If you are interested in learning about different puja items used in this ceremony, please check this link.